Interesting article I read today in my new MS Momentum magazine I received today. The article talks about “hugs”. HA! As most of my family and close friends know me – I am not a hugger. Never was, but now even more so because half of the time I am always in pain. Sooooo, when people want to hug me I want to have a tantrum but I oblige and suck it up and give out hugs. The article that I read was called “Things you might want to avoid saying to someone with MS”. Gee I wish I can tape this on me where ever I go because — frankly the article says it all.
“BUT YOU LOOK SO GOOD” If I had a dollar every time someone said this to me, I would be extremely wealthy. Sure I look good, I always look good, I’m pretty, gorgeous big woman. But… that does not mean I feel great on the inside. Geez. Hello people! get a grip. #1 rule just because you look good, does not mean you feel good or have an illness. #2 rule suffering is not always visible. Just because I don’t have the look of pain and there are actually visible things on my body that you can see that will determine I am ill. This is where the MS HUG comes in. I am always feeling like I have a tight rope or noose around my waist and back area. When people hug me, it makes me so tense because I never know if I am going to be in pain or not, how about when I am sooooo tired I cannot function – people say to me, oh you just need a good nights sleep – WHAT! Hello again, slap yourself silly! It is one of the most common symptoms of MS – fatigue – It hits at all times of the day – does not matter if I got 12 hours of sleep.
Another one I just love this one — I have met many people in my life time. It never fails me — I always get that one person “OH, I KNOW SOMEONE WHO HAS MS!” – PULEEZE people – MS does not come in one size fits all (words from the article – OMG I love that) or shape. Everyone has different symptoms, everyone has different problems. Just because you are feeling tingling on your feet does not mean you have MS. You have to be diagnosed by a neurologist and an MRI scan to determine you officially have MS. I have people come up to me all the damn time – I am dizzy — well so am I, but I don’t announce it to every single person I meet, I love this one – I am just like you! I have everything you have – ummm no I don’t think so – if you only knew what has been going on with me the last 3 months and last 3 weeks, there is no comparison –
Last but not least – “ARE YOU SURE YOU HAVE MS?” – Well, Golly Ms Molly – if I wasn’t sure I would not be talking about it now would I? Yes I have MS but I don’t have to have a detailed explanations as to how I got it now do I? Do I need to have a license to have MS – to have a validated excuse to talk about it? – Hmmm – there’s a thought. There is nothing more aggravating when someone says that to me, what a way to throw me off balance and think – are you smart or dumb?
I just think by reading this article, it has really hit home. I think of all the years I have had MS and the explanations I have had to give to people even my own mother didn’t understand what the disease was. All she saw was how fat I was! I know that people mean well, they are concerned and for those of you who have taken the time to see how I am doing – I really do appreciate that, just not the 1,000 questions.
MS and My Life 
How about the “Ohhh, no wonder! It all makes sense now” after people finding out about MS.
Guilty as charged, which you already knew, I said that about my cousin, but after hearing few people saying the same thing about my cousin & you– it did annoy me, too.
“So that’s why she/he was always grumpy”, “No wonder she/he looked so stressed & so angry.” & etc.
I am sure we all do sometimes look so grumpy, stressed, angry, tired, & etc… Hey! MAYBE we do have MS, too!
We should have taken a minute and think, “Maybe it is the people that they see everyday that makes them feel that way sometimes, or they have a bad day, or whatever… I am like that way sometimes, too.”